Love takes time

It's time

2011-10-15T01:17:00.000+03:00

it's time to open wide the door
breathing in and out slow,
i'm inviting you inside
come on, have some courage!

close all the doors of your past
walk in and take the present
i want to be your last
time for you to take your place.

it's time for you to be loved
to take your place in my heart
learning how to trust, to dream
flying high by my side.

don't be afraid, don't shiver
all the cold is gone
it's time for a long summer
full of smiles and love.

i sometimes

2011-09-21T16:52:00.000+03:00

i sometimes stumble
can't keep my balance and fall
i sometimes look at you and lie
and you believe it all.

i sometimes think you don't exist
as evidence of you is lost
i sometimes give up the fight
and let it all go.

i sometimes say i'm sorry
when there is no way out
i sometimes run away
but it keeps catching up.

i sometimes feel i'm falling for you
can't keep my distance
i sometimes look at you and lie
repeating to myself you're my mistake.

somewhere

2011-08-06T11:57:00.000+03:00

somewhere you are all in the back
lost in between my words
contemplating on what i said
that is where you are.

life is a game of truth
can't be won by cheating
so i'll play hard
as long as you're all in the back.

i've thrown the bate and ran,
you can fight all you want today,
my treasure is in my bag,
left you all in the back.

i'm all alone for my next move,
the winning love of all is mine.
this is what i got ready for,
one last fight.

The big picture

2011-07-18T20:03:00.000+03:00

taking pictures of my life
memories for later,
ten thousand words unheard
colours everywhere i look.

i'm in the middle of my picture
but that is not where i belong,
not where i want to grow old
i'm saving up that space for love.

you'll come around someday and see
the empty space that needs you,
words and pictures incomplete
crying out your name constantly.

i'm waiting patiently for us
for me to be in the middle of your picture
for you to see my ten thousand words,
love will glue our lives together.

I'm loving you

2011-07-07T00:48:00.000+03:00

from the first time i saw you
in a very crowded place
your beauty jumped in my face
i loved you.

your thoughts, your ideas
the sound of your voice
the way you told me you can't
i even loved that.

staring at eachother
the mystery in your eyes
the softness of your lips
i loved you even when we didn't kiss.

i love you now more than ever
you took down my walls
gave me the freedom i longed for
i love you more.

don't be afraid

2011-06-27T16:48:00.000+03:00

i close my eyes for a moment
make a little wish in my mind
you are in front of me
crying your soul out for him.

this makes me wonder all over again,
what is love nowadays?
what is it if not the passion
to make the one you love happy.

deeds to cover all the needs,
are more important than words
it is better if you never say 'i love you'
as long as you show it everyday.

my little wish won't come true
as i wished for you to be happy,
you'll never be though
not as long as you're afraid.

Walls

2011-06-17T16:56:00.002+03:00

outside the massive walls you built
are my own massive walls
you want to keep everyone out
i don't want to get outside.

every now and again we break them down
speak great words, hug, looks and almost love
but then we hurt and we build them back
my massive walls, your massive walls.

will always be apart as it gets dark
i have some of your secrets inside my walls
you have some of my tears inside yours
maybe we should swap and move along.

there is nothing that can bring these walls down
love is not strong enough to help us
not coming from inside our broken hearts
i've locked hope out and built my walls tall,
you?

Stay away

2011-06-10T15:16:00.000+03:00

as i say the magic words
the words i kept locked inside
in the safe of my heart
you blew it up and apart
grabbed it all and ran
but now you're back.

what made you come back around?
did the love i gave you finish?
do you need another shot?
do you need a shoulder to cry on?
there is nothing here for you love,
no smiles, no words, no patience.

listen close, it's only coming once
there are so many things i regret
but you are the biggest one
your face is beautiful, your soul is dead
so get away from my love.

i am sorry for giving you my magic words
for making you my princess
for trusting your love again
start running and run far away.

2011-05-27T21:29:00.000+03:00

today,
i fall on my knees,
look at the blue sky
crying for the past
praying for the future.

yesterday,
i was running on the wrong path
thought i could rule the world
the wrong kind of love
suffocating my heart.

tomorrow,
i will be better then today
help everyone around
the Jesus love burning up
i now have a servant's heart.

23:33

2011-05-21T16:21:00.000+03:00

this room is filled with emptiness
i am not even here
my presence is absent
my noise has been silenced.

my dreams are broken by a whisper
hopes are flying out of reach
words are slowly dying
as i try to gently speak.

the pain in this moment is eternal
it will never hurt like this again
nightmares make it easier
love's not even in the picture.

a lost sound makes it to my ear
as i snap out from the land of the lost
there is nothing bigger
than a whisper of love.

Late

2011-05-15T17:55:00.000+03:00

its late, very late
my eyes are heavy
im almost asleep
my thoughts are all over

i think of you for a second,
for a dream we are again
flying towards a past
this dream aint gonna last.

open my eyes wide, look around
no past, no you, just light
just future yet to come
a little bit left of the now.

drops of pain fall away,
replaced by smiles instantly
there is no us where i am
it might have been in vain.

This poem

2011-05-04T19:38:00.000+03:00

this poem was meant for you
for happy days and smiles
was meant to show a greater love
but now it's killing me.

the words have changed in time
it bites my soul again and again
this poem is against me
hiding in my journal.

it comes out every now and then
reminds me of my past
bites and hides again
leaving a cold shiver behind.

could rearrange the words
or even change'em
could run away somewhere new
or i could stay with you.

Lack of inspiration

2011-04-19T20:16:00.000+03:00

can't offer you anythin you don't have,
i don't claim to be the one
there are so many things i dont know
yet here i am in front of you.

there are no words for this
just images blocked in my head
you, hugging me slowly
me falling in love.

i just want to confess all my thoughts
wish you were the one
some words could help me now
nothing can brake the silence though.

Don't be afraid

2011-04-14T00:50:00.000+03:00

'don't be afraid' i slowly whisper
as the sunset falls
and the people fade away.
'i'll be here'.

grab my hand gently and smile
today the future looks better
there are no storms to come
not when you're with me.

let this love fill you
raise you up to the sky
forget about the tears
forget about the rain.

this is what i feel
happiness is real
your image makes my dreams
your words heal my hurts.

falling slowly

2011-03-29T00:30:00.000+03:00

your little stories, smiles
your laugh, talk, walk
your eyes, your gentle soul
amazing words can't describe.

here we are again tonight
sourounded by people yet alone
should i hug you? kiss you?
maybe just smile and leave.

my body won't listen to my brain
it wont move my feet,
i just want to look at you
my heart is in control again.

With you in mind...

2011-03-20T19:59:00.000+02:00

i don't want to hear about love,
don't want to shiver when i see you,
don't want my pulse to go through the roof
don't want my heart broken.

yet here i am in front of you,
if you could read my thoughts
probably slap me and run,
wish i could kiss you now.

the wind is playing with your hair
i'm looking at your hand
i'd like to hold it for a lifetime
confess everything i feel.

Useful

2011-03-13T20:04:00.000+02:00

a little window opened in your heart
waiting around i noticed something
things started falling outside
yet i caught them all.

another window opened wide
tears started falling fast
caught them all in a glass
so it wouldnt touch the cold ground.

knocking gently at your door
hoping you will open
so i can give your things back
finaly move on from your heart.

the door slowly opened letting me in
the mess i found inside,
the look on your face
sadness was all around.

cleaned everything up and gave you a hug
nice perfumes everywhere arounds us.
a loud knock at the door scared me,
you left your past in, threw me out.

Lost and found

2011-03-06T19:29:00.000+02:00

i came to cry at your feet
from long and distant roads
for a while i was lost
yet, you met my need.

i came to be a servant in your house,
no longer the son you desired,
yet you put a ring on my finger
that shows i am forgiven.

i came to eat merely a loaf of bread
not the calf you sacrificed
my clothes were all threads
yet, you dressed me like a prince.

i came to you expecting judgement
yet you told me not to cry,
'Laugh, now my son, rejoice,
You were dead but now you're alive'.

this soul of mine

2011-02-27T17:15:00.000+02:00

sometimes this soul of mine
feels so numb, so out of place
lost in a forest of souls
lost deep within itself.

the emptiness of my dreams
the nothingness of my aspirations
makes my soul bleed tears
crawl in a cave of desparation.

every now and again you shine on it
you make it fluffy and happy
everything seems so simple and easy
when you are holding my soul.

between now and again is a gap of pitch black
where my senses get lost and i lose track
my soul hides so deep within itself
that it seems frozen and dark.

Circle of life

2011-02-20T16:57:00.000+02:00

I sank in a darkness
that blinded me
Not even an image
No picture, no clue.

My head was very heavy
So i slowly touched my face
I was wearing all these masks
Now all of them at once.

Fearfully i started touching them
Everytime i did, it brought back memories
of what i had been and when,
Tried to find my real face, but it was no more

Removing them was not an option
As the pain was terrible trying
I was happy i couldn't see myself
But i felt the masks - liar, lustful, broken, too-good-to-be-true, disspointing
and so much more.

Suddenly a tiny light showed up
Following my instincts i retreated
The light just got bigger and bigger
A human form walked out of it.

Mesmerized by its beautiful release
I froze as it was coming towards me
With a huge smile on its face it got close
It was a very happy man i noticed.

I saw a reflection of myself in his eyes,
and i collapsed to the ground terrified.
My ugliness wash horrible and damaging
Yet he raised me up.

Gently he started removing my masks
The pain was killing me but he was holding my hand.
One after another he threw them into the light
And my masks were gone forever.

I was staring him in the eye
When i saw my real face reflection
The monster i've become now
Wished for my masks back.

Gently he started fixing my face
It looked better and better as he washed it in something red
The smile on his face was healing me
The light around us making me hope.

He slowly reached inside me
Made my heart beat differently
Then broke some of his light
And planted it in my body.

He, then, dissapeared but the light was still there
I felt him inside me now
Could hear his thoughts whispering
I looked around amazed and scared
The light was coming from me now
As i walked to someone's darkness

Every now and then you break my heart

2011-02-13T16:30:00.001+02:00

I stand somewhere in the distance
look at you and remember,
all the games we have played
nothing matters now, we've lost.

what can we share now,
how could we go back to us?
the wind blowing in my face
you are freezing my heart out.

it's nothing but a heartache
it comes and goes every now and then
i would love to hug you again
to kiss and love and hold you.

i admit defeat and give up
you're not coming back
every now and then i miss you
every now and then you break my heart.

Blood in my mouth

2011-02-07T20:28:00.000+02:00

i've had enough of this
living out of a suitcase
hoping that someday you'll call
you'll want me back.

lately i can't feel you at all
i can't feel my hands
can't sleep anymore
still waiting alone.

you promised me heaven,
the definiton of love
haven't seen your face in so long
starting to get lost.

woke up facing the ground
blood in my mouth
i've had enough of you,
time to move on.

captive

2011-01-31T15:14:00.000+02:00

you've tied me to a metal chair
with ropes i can't break
you come by every day
then you go away.

is it day, is it night?
i have lost the track
you came again in the darkness
but this time you hit me.

made me your slave, locked away.
are my eyes opened or closed?
so much darkness around me
blow after blow until you are tired.

what did i do to deserve this?
how did i hurt you so bad?
my heart is awake again
it cries out freedom.

ups and downs

2011-01-24T14:44:00.000+02:00

i've said so many times,
i'll never leave
always be close by
you'll never miss me.

you trusted all my words
never asked a question
you thought i was saving you
that i was your refuge.

you gave me all your thoughts
crafted wonderfully with tears
all your secrets laid out
thought i have the answers.

you started building new on me
with passion and love alltogether
with smiles and happiness
all i could say was 'yes'.

but i can't do this now, love
i'm only human myself
falling into a void of hoplessness
catch me, hold me, save me please.

locked

2011-01-17T14:05:00.000+02:00

locked away in a fortress
sourrounded by solitutde
away from the eyes of the world,
away from the hurting word.

a glimpse of the outside
sun shining, its warmth
could love ever set me free?
what else is outhere for me?

just one last wish burdens my soul
there is no night and day here
no other human being
still wish someone would break in.

could someone fall in love with me?
the monster i've become
that's why i'm locked away in here.
will love set me free?

punishment

2011-01-09T01:33:00.000+02:00

no words have power to show
meaning of the feelings inside
sorry means nothing at all
not even stopping time would matter.

you have the right to hit me,
slowly hurt and destroy this soul
as it brought you to your knees
start hurting me now.

close my eyes and stop crying
waiting for your hits
come on, bring it as hard as you can
i deserve all the pain.

is it over yet?
can i open my eyes?
why can't i feel anything?
am i still alive?

choice

2011-01-03T00:29:00.001+02:00

i trapped time in a box
started walking all the way
now time won't be a problem
we can live forever in this second.

my steps are small and weary
i've been walking for a month now
frozen pictures all around me
i'm not in a hurry but i'll get there.

angry thoughts surround me
wild animals that want to devour
what if you don't want me?
is time the one keeping us apart?

outside your house, your paradise
don't know if i can take a 'no'
tears in my eyes as i walk past
release the time and move on.

quest

2010-12-24T01:19:00.000+02:00

these are not my dreams,
not my purposes at all
tak'em away now please
let me be free!

i seem to have lost myself
somewhere along the road
this is not me at all
i don't feel free!

blury, faded memories far away
battles and wars in the past,
who is this me i am now?
i still am not free!

where could i be?
maybe lost in the maze of the soul
shouts and fights to bring me back
i just wanna be free!

2010-12-20T14:39:00.002+02:00

MERRY CHRISTMAS! WE CELEBRATE JESUS ALONE

just sleeping

2010-12-20T13:12:00.000+02:00

the sunshine aint enough
pils are not working
this love is not dying
no happiness, no laugh.

kings and queens and tales
all with happy endings
real life is just a lie,
how can i chase the truth?

some things are facts and real
love doesnt hurt, it heals.
i can't but ask and answer
am i sleeping or awake?

selfish reasons to pursue
the world is falling to pieces,
yet i care about some words
love is not dead, just sleeping.

not going away

2010-12-16T01:54:00.001+02:00

you can doubt me every day
hit me with your words
i am not going anywhere
even though it hurts.

you can shout out loud daily
you hate me all over again
push me as far as you can
i will run all the way back.

sometimes you'll be dissapointed
falling out in vain, in hate
may think love is all gone
that is not true, as long as i'm around.

every time you will fall
i will catch you, love,
every time you will cry out you hate me
i will be there to catch your tears.

All this because I LOVE YOU.

hero?

2010-12-13T13:16:00.000+02:00

would you still love me
if i am not a hero?
for how long will you wait
for me to come back to life?

sometimes i make to much of you
i think you are an angel of hope
other times i despise everything
nothing but a devil i think you are.

i want to be your hero
but there is nothing to save you from
i am afraid of all you can do
all the pain you put me through.

so now before i run away again,
would you tell me please
are you an angel or a demon?
cause i'm not a hero.

Questions, can you answer ?

2010-12-09T17:17:00.002+02:00

stop for a second
answer this questions
how many people sacrificed
something for your good?

how many kings would die
so you could live happly everafter
how many kingdoms would change
so you have happiness?

which friend of yours would cry for you
so you can smile peacefully
who will fight your battles
when you are hit and dying?

who will catch your tears
so you can see clear
who will slowly whisper in your ear
i love you all over again?

2010-12-08T12:58:00.000+02:00

iluzii

2010-12-06T14:28:00.000+02:00

in ochii'ti mari si gingasi
ai strans iubire o viata
sa o dai in dar ti'era dorinta
dar cine'i demn de ea?

inima ti'a fost rapita odata
in suflet frica ti'a patruns
din iubire usor tot ai ascuns
sa nu mai vada toti minunea.

ai vrut sa imi dai mie din ea
sa versi in mine fericire
sa fim doar noi uitati de lume
prinsi in momente de iubire.

dar n'am stiut cum sa primesc
cum sa iti soptesc usor
ca vreau, ca te iubesc
acum nu sunt, nu esti...

it's cold outside

2010-12-03T18:02:00.000+02:00

it cold and dark outside
yet you feel on fire
your mind is burning inside
asking you questions out loud.

why did you do it?
selling him like he was nothing
have you got no heart?
or was it all planned?

do you feel rich now?
does it feel better?
your name will be forever
the name of a traitor.

pain is growing inside you
remorse makes you run away
can't take time back
your kiss has sealed it.

there is no chance for escape
no place for you to hide
not even death can heal you
your pain will be forever there.

silver has no value now
although you have so much
it's your turn to go down
maybe you can still change, Judah!

almost there

2010-11-30T17:06:00.000+02:00

i've fallen so hard into you
after you pushed me.
you made me wanna love
i just wanted to fly again.

took me on your golden wings
so high into the sky
i touched the stars one by one
when your lips touched mine.

we flew for a while into the night
it was all a miracle of light
your love made me human again
no longer just a shadow in vain.

i must have done something bad
cause at some point i started falling
you were looking at me as i was dying
just smiling and ignoring me.

real?!

2010-11-25T19:45:00.000+02:00

am i still standing?
after all your hits,
after all the pain
am i still breathing?

is this me dreaming?
or am i living?
so many questions
that don't need an answer.

you were almost mine
got to close to you
lost all of the fights
am i still a warrior?

i felt the pain
i felt it in my brain
it got down to my heart
tearing me apart!

i'm getting back together
everything in the right place
it's not cold anymore
to live i need more love!

Stop?!

2010-11-23T18:21:00.000+02:00

Stop

STOP!!!
don't talk anymore,
don't move to anywhere
don't try to come back.

Go!!!
somewhere i can't see you,
anywhere i can't hear you,
any place that is far enough.

Don't!
ever look back to us,
ever hope you'll come home,
dare to believe i will wait.

Do!
forget all our memories,
leave behind the tears,
kill me one more time.

Last time

2010-11-15T14:37:00.000+02:00

this is the last time
i try to walk again
try to find beauty
fight for what i feel.

one last step in faith,
faith that you believe,
one last smile
for one last wonder.

i put my armor for one last time
one last fight
this time to the death
no going back, not giving up.

a rose for a weapon
a heart for a shield
an army of one,
this is the last time,
i will fall in love.

Freedom

2010-11-12T14:37:00.002+02:00

i see the window open from across the room
wild thoughts light up imagination
small steps take me towards it fast
i cant control this body anymore.

i look out the window at the clear sky
flying doesnt seem to be a problem
as long as i believe in it.
almost out the window
can't stop myself from stepping out.

i give up fighting and let the peace come
not worried that i have no wings
just floating up to the sky
no more worries, no more love or hate
just freedom, simple FREEDOM.

I wanted...

2010-11-06T22:05:00.001+02:00

i wanted to see you everyday
i wanted to smile together,
to watch you from a distance
being late at our first date.
i wanted to marry you...

i wanted to argue with you
about the name of our first child
i wanted to take you home to my parents
i wanted you to meet all my friends.
i wanted to walk next to you.

i wanted to catch all your tears
to make you feel perfect love
i wanted us to eat breakfast together
i wanted to make love to you
on our wedding night.

i wanted to come home from work
and see you waiting for me
i wanted you to want me...
i guess we dont always get what we want.

Opreste'te!

2010-10-25T17:15:00.001+03:00

masti crescute in carne,
ascund cine suntem
nu le putem scoate
ne transformam in brute.

timpi aruncati in gol
ore irosite pe nimic
minciuni ce le numim adevarate
dureri mai mult mincinoase.

nu mai suntem ce spunem
nici macar ce facem,
ne ascundem in noi insine
ne ascundem chiar de noi.

cocosati intrun colt de ruina
ascunsi in adanc de suflet
transfigurati de dureri si ploi
nu vrem sa recunoastem ca suntem goi.

hai sa ne oprim putin mai mult
sa privim in oglinda ce'am ascuns'o
sa smulgem masca penibilitatii
chiar de'o sa ne doara.

unde'alergi acum straine?
incotro vrei sa evadezi?
opreste'te mai mult de'o clipa
nu vezi k totu'i minciuna?

This is the question...

2010-10-25T02:23:00.003+03:00

i am tired, so tired
i want to sleep
just want to sleep,
but i'm afraid to turn off the lights.
as soon as its dark you show up
my eyes are closed yet i can see,
you are real but i cant touch.
slowly you put your hand through my hair
and kiss my eyes and my cheeks.
it's so wonderful to have you near.
happiness is complete in this moment,
i smile but i am not asleep.
how can i get some rest with you here?
if i will fall asleep then morning will come
all of my dreams and you will be gone.
so i stay awake and i cant turn off the lights
i dont want you to come anymore.
cause if you come there will be a time
when you will have to leave again.
that is the question now
am i happy with or without you?

I won again

2010-10-24T01:36:00.004+03:00

i remember you looking at me
raping my soul with no mercy
punching me in the face
throwing me all over the place

pulled my heart out of my chest
dragged it in the middle of the road
just to stab it over and over again.

poisoned me with giant lies
touched me gentle and smiled
looking straight into my eyes
you took away my pride.

but guess what though
i dont need a soul to feel
dont need a heart to love
dont need eyes to see.

every single piece of me
cries out your name
every single drop of blood
misses you a lot.

you are inside of me now
i breathe your perfume
you are me
and i am happy.

Patience

2010-10-24T00:52:00.001+03:00

surrounded by lies,
i choose to forgive,
leaving your words behind
waiting for signs.

love can't be hidden away
in a small corner of my heart
it takes up a big part
even though it hurts a lot.

sacrifices will be made
with a smile on my face
ignoring you is not an option
waiting patiently for daylight.

i will be ok without you,
certainly incomplete
as long as you have a heart
love can grow back.

patience is a virtue
it makes me stronger
one day you will open your eyes
i will be waiting here.

Looking back

2010-10-22T22:36:00.003+03:00

looking back on my window,
back all the way in the past.
it was just you and me
and it was almost dark.

you asked me a question
"what is my biggest fear?"
i gave you my answer,
you took it but didn't smile.

the moonlight was hugging you
as i was doing the same
my soul felt that was home
we were all alone.

i looked deep into your eyes,
i almost saw your soul,
a beautiful diamond
one good hiding place.

we slowly got closer and closer,
feeling your lips on mine,
my heart started beating faster
what a feeling, what a disaster.

tears started racing down my face
all the hidden feelings raced
my soul exploded with a blast
you promised you'll come back.

For free is...nothing

2010-10-22T20:55:00.001+03:00

All i have left is ashes
nothingness and emptyness,
lack of hope,
tears collected in a bottle.

still dream of immortality
drag my bottle closer
to pour another tear,
i know i have to fight for it.

still dream of endless love,
a fire that always burns,
the passion of "to do",
instead of "to say".

thorns stabbed my hand
as i tried to grab happyness
nothing is for free
fighting is just a way to pay for it.

To my past

2010-10-21T18:26:00.002+03:00

its over,
i surrender now.
i put up my hands
and fall on my knees.
no more power in my heart
no more fighting,
cant fight you anymore
i just wanna surrender.

avoiding to see your eyes
to show you my wounds,
this battle will end here.
nobody else is fighting,
you keep hitting me
but it doesnt hurt anymore.

does it make you feel better
to see me bleeding?
hit me all over again
it doesnt hurt anymore.
slowly i fall and hit the ground
a huge smile is on my face
i'm in love now
youre not the one
all of the pain is gone.

for my future wife...

2010-10-15T20:47:00.001+03:00

hold still now
don't move, just dream
have a little patience
don't give your love away
just stay strong
a little bit longer.

smile and wait please,
i am on my way to you
i got lost for a while
my thoughts were stolen
my heart was broken
dreams were shattered
life was dying slowly.

wait a little bit more
i am almost there
soon in your arms
we will be happy
i bring love and happines
it's all new
all for you,
soon husband and wife
we will be.

when will i see?

2010-10-15T16:52:00.001+03:00

i am trying to get back,
to myself, my old life
it seems i keep going into a wall.
a wall that you bulit
to keep me locked inside you.
i am lost in your world
i have got no map
how can you do this?
have you got no heart?

when will i realise for once
you are enemy not friend,
you want to bury me.
i will fight this war of yours.
when sight is back
the victory is mine
just a little more patience
soon you will be gone.

Inca stai in prag

2010-10-01T19:04:00.001+03:00

am deschis usa larg si ai intrat
ai privit in jur o vreme
apoi ai pasit inauntru,
nici macar nu te'ai descaltat
de cizmele murdare de trecut.

era totul curat si pregatit de viitor,
plin de speranta si dorinta de mai mult
ai ravasit gand dupa gand,
ai luat tot ce era mai scump
m'ai privit, ai ras si apoi ai vrut sa pleci,
te'ai oprit in usa.

oricat de mult incerc sa te alung,
esti tot acolo, tot in prag,
iei tot din mine si arunci afara,
in lumea ce racneste si omoara
tot cei pur si diferit.

Ploaia cu mine

2010-10-01T02:14:00.001+03:00

a inceput usor sa ploua.
picuri ma izbesc violent,
ma opresc incet din mers,
imi ridic privirea spre cer
il privesc serios apoi zambesc.

stau.
ploaia ma curata
de ganduri negre
imi trezeste simturi,
ma schimba.

simt cu imi patrunde
adanc in suflet,
in inima,
o vindeca.
deschid ochii si e senin.

cu pasi rapizi inaintez,
sunt pregatit acum.
sunt gata sa merg la razboi,
cu o lume murdara si grea
avand cu mine ploaia.

You are real

2010-08-17T19:07:00.001+03:00

you are real, truly real
I hold you in my arms
Slowly I whisper my dreams
And you listen to all of my words.

Your smile is more beautiful
Than all my best memories
Your perfume is inside me now
It seems that you followed it
And stopped inside my heart.

As you leave for a long journey
Would you want to look back?
To give me the safety
that you are real,
that you will always remember me.

Just a man

2010-08-16T19:35:00.001+03:00

I would like to be a dream
To tickle your senses every night
To appear and show you the future
Give you happiness every time you fall asleep,
Put a smile on your face when you wake up.

I would like to be a tea cup,
So when you drink tea
You could kiss me
And I could feel your softly lips

If I could only be the road you walk on,
You would never take the wrong turn
As I would guide your steps
I would show you the way.

If I could only be your conscience
I would slowly whisper in the back of your mind
What is good and what is wrong,
And would be one step closer
To perfection.

But I am just a simple man,
Land and sea keep us apart
I haven’t seen you in a while
All I have right now is hope,
Hope that someday I will be all of that
For you…..

Pana cand?

2010-08-15T18:09:00.001+03:00

Mainile noastre murdare
Picteaza icoane dupa icoane
Le uda apoi cu putina apa
Le pun in biserica
Apoi se roaga.

De ce sa ne rugam la o pictura
Facuta de noi?
De ce sa plangem in fata ei?
De ce sa asteptam minuni
Din partea unui lemn?

Cum putem sfida Creatorul
Rugandu-ne la creatie?
Cat ne mai suporta oare pamantul?
Nu mai este mult.

Mult de mers

2010-08-15T17:42:00.001+03:00

Merg prea incet pentru tine
Esti cu multi pasi inaintea mea
Ai uitat ca am ramas in urma
Vorbele imi sunt furate de vant.

Intind mana dar esti prea departe
Mult pamant si apa intre noi.
Tu zburai cand eu ma opream,
Fost-ai tu candva aproape?

A trecut mult de la ultima dimineata,
Cand ma trezesc e tot noapte.
Ridic privirea spre fereastra,
Nu pot privi pana la tine.

Nu am incredere in razele de soare,
Ma striga parca sa te caut.
Imi arata ele drumul, locul,
Doar sa le urmez si-atat.

Definind iubirea

2010-08-15T00:45:00.000+03:00

iubirea e iertare si rabdare,
e un salt in necuprins,
zambetul ce apare din senin,
intelegere si schimbare.

Iubirea este o putere indescriptibila,
este curajul ce de multe ori lipseste,
privirea sincera si inocenta,
timpul ce parca s-a oprit.

dedicare si pasiune nascute din iubire,
zborul lin si gingas al cuvintelor
pace, multumire si recunostiinta,
complimente reale in iubire prind viata.

smerenie si bunatate,liniste
fapte ce vorbesc din iubire,
renuntare, reincepere si dedicare
corectitudinea ce aduce incredere.

o singura dorinta de mi-as permite
aceasta iubire sa imi patrunda fiinta,
fiecare celula sa renasca
si toate acestea sa fie din iubire.

Falling into hope

2010-07-26T19:56:00.000+03:00

For every angel in my life
I cut a piece of my heart
It turns out to be the devil
Tearing me apart.

So tired after all of the fights
Hurt and almost destroyed
Can't even open my eyes
How will i recognize the sun rise?

Going from bad to worse
will i recognize hope in time?
Gently i touch my chest
All of the heart is gone.

Out of nowhere a mystical voice
Cries out for me in another language
I struggle to open my eyes
Trying to see if it's another dark angel.

I painfully rise on my knees
Open just one broken eye
To see for my salvation
An angel of the right.

Holding all of the pieces of my heart
Has wondered all over the world
Just to bring all of them back
I slowly fall back into hope...

Peste

2009-12-08T15:55:00.001+02:00

Peste anii ce vor trece,
peste toate fetzele,
peste sentimente si greseli,
peste lacrimi si zambete,
mereu imi voi aminti de tine,
peste negurile veacului
tot voi mai spera
ca iti vei aminti si tu.

De fiecare data cand imi voi aminti
voi sarbatori cu un zambet curat
rasul va rasuna puternic in inima mea
viata mi se va lumina
de fiecare data cand imi voi aminti.

In razboi

2009-12-08T15:54:00.001+02:00

Am intrat in razboi,
legat la maini,
legat la ochi.
Nu am arme,doar sperante,
Pot doar sa fug,
Sa sper ca-i calea dreapta,
sa omor iubirea ce-mi da speranta,
Sa renunt la cine ma asteapta acasa.
Sa nu mai cred in mine,
sa nu mai creada nimeni.
Doar daca nu mai am nimic de pierdut,
doar atunci voi castiga totul,
Atunci voi simti glontul,
Ma voi feri si-apoi,
Apoi totul e-n Carte.

Am nevoie

2009-12-08T15:53:00.000+02:00

Am nevoie de cineva,sa ma auda cand strig
Am nevoie de cineva,sa ma ridice din noroi
Am nevoie de cineva,spre care sa fug
La rascruce incotro sa alerg?

Unde esti tu,sa-mi prinzi lacrima?
Unde esti tu,ce mi-ai schimbat viata?
Unde esti tu sa vezi ce am ajuns?
Cand am ajuns la capat incotro s-apuc?

Unde e zambetul tau,ce aduce viata?
Cand va veni,iar,cu tine dimineata?
Daca lumea ar fi perfect de dreapta,
Tu,iubire,ai dormi langa mine diseara.

Iti aud vocea printre soapte frante,
Tu nu mai esti acolo decat ieri,
Trecutul nu mai vine si vreau sa recunosc
Am nevoie de tine sa iubesc!

Am nevoie de cineva sa ma auda cand strig,
Unde esti tu ce mi-ai schimbat viata?
Cand va veni cu tine iar dimineata?
Tu nu mai esti acolo decat ieri.

Nu mai astepta

2009-12-08T15:52:00.000+02:00

nu mai astepta iubito,
nu mai vin vreodata
dezbracat de orgoliu,
am fost secerat.

m-am indragostit pe drum
nu mai astepta iubito,
am facut erori de neiertat
nu ma pot ridica.

nu mai am ce sa iti ofer,
ti-am pierdut cadoul,
nu mai astepta iubito,
nu-mi duce dorul,

nu plange ca n-am sa vin,
am doar durere cu mine,
nu vreau sa plangi,
nu mai astepta iubito.

Iubesc...

2009-12-08T15:51:00.000+02:00

Iubesc sa te omor!
Sa te arunc din ganduri,
cat mai departe,
Apoi s-astept sa-mi fie dor,
Sa te aduc 'napoi,
din cea mai 'tunecata noapte.

Iubesc sa te incui pe-afar',
Sa uit ca te-am avut vreodat',
Sa plang apoi de tine si de dorul tau
Sa ma intorc umil iar la tine.

Iubesc sa am iubirea ta la dispozitie,
Sa stiu ca e am mea oricand,
Iubesc sa te iubesc,iubire
Tot raul e spre un mai mare bine.

O ramasita

2009-09-07T22:41:00.000+03:00

O ultima ramasita de zi,
am pierdut-o,
a cazut prin buzunarul spart,
altcineva o va gasi,
se va bucura de ea.

Un ultim zambet sincer
sters de pe fata murdara
de o furtuna de suparari,
la ce imi folosea oricum?

O ultima dorinta,
sa pot pleca,
mai am de gasit o ramasita.

O batista...

2009-09-07T22:33:00.000+03:00

Ma plimb cu mintea goala
Pe o suprafata trista
Nimeni nu mai zboara
Toti cu sentimentele-n batista.

Imi ascund ochii de umbre
Te privesc de la rasarit la apus
Mereu in spate, calcandu-ti pe urme
Am mintea goala si atatea de spus.

Pamantul a inghetat sub picioare,
De ce si cum un zambet doare?
Ma impiedic de vise risipite
Ti-am gasit batista, e plina de sentimente

In drumul carjelor mele

2009-06-20T20:30:00.000+03:00

Multi oameni trec in drumul carjelor mele
Ma tarasc si eu pe langa ei
Multi zic din toata inima ca sunt atei
Ca ei cred k nu exista Dumnezeu
Si totusi ei cred in ceva,
cred ca nu cred ca exista,
dar daca totusi este?
ei sunt atat de "cruji" cu lumea
pana la ultima picatura, traieste clipa,
dar daca totusi este?
multi trec in drumul carjelor mele
ei cred ca ma tarasc si eu pe langa ei
de fapt eu zbor si carjele-mi sunt aripi
pentru ca eu cred ca exista,
undeva sau poate candva sau chiar acum
un Creator....

The fall before the rise

2009-06-20T16:58:00.001+03:00

time of miracles is far away now,
time of faith has gone with the wind
all of the earth has turned black,
still looking for love but is dark
could use some fire as i miss the light.
the air in my lungs is almos over
"where are you? why my lover?"
my soul is tired as i let it go
it flies to the place with still waters
it's in Heaven now....

I will be happy!

2009-06-20T16:56:00.000+03:00

Earth, no longer my home
Hate, turned me into stone
My thoughts belong to heaven
My soul is almost there.
Happiness awaits as i count the seconds,
i need no water in Paradise,
as i will drink the magic potion of Love.
The air I need so much here will be gone,
as i will breathe your thoughts.
Even if i have to go through fire,
I will fight,I will survive
I will be happy!

Incaltat in creierii tai

2009-05-29T20:02:00.000+03:00

creierii tai sunt slapi
umblu incaltat in ei
te port mereu spre culmi mai bune
te ajut si iti ofer sperante
vorbe racoritoare iti soptesc
in zilele fierbinti de august
si te incalzesc in decembrie
tu imi oferi comfort si siguranta
eu umblu incaltat in creierii tai
iti arat drumul cel bun
stiu ca nu va dura la infinit
altcineva imi lua locul curand
el va umbla in ei zambind
ca dupa o batalie importanta,
el va crede ca a castigat.
el va umbla in ei,
te va purta peste tot prin lume,
pe culmi rele si bune,
el va umbla in ei
dar nu va putea pasi pe urmele mele.

Experience

2009-05-27T01:50:00.000+03:00

another smile from another girl coming at me
i look at her with hate in my dark eyes
i reject everything that leeds to love
that is what i say in my broken mind
why should i love and why should i trust
when i know is not love it is lust
and in the end it will be mixed with the desert's dust.
i look out the dirty window in the old bar
the sun is fading and i am still not gone
what am i waiting for? i ask the glass on my table
the bottle is almost empty and i cant take another round
i lay my head down and slowly i fade,i dream
i see u far away taken by the mistic wind
no people around me yet i hear a whispering voice
trying to understand it but it is all noise
all around me people appear, i let down
my mother,my father and u somewhere in the dark
why dont u come to me and look me in my face
dont u see i have fallen so deep in disgrace
a smile shines on my face as u dissaper
a smile full of pain and venom and fear
i open my eyes scared and look around
no mom and dad, no you,just the empty pub
one more glass and i'm gone...

O bucata de pamant

2009-05-24T00:22:00.000+03:00

totul se intoarce de unde a plecat,
cate lacrimi am varsat,
totul in zadar este acum si zbier
totul se transforma in desert
lacrimile se usuca si as vrea sa plec
unde as putea sa ma ascund de ochii Tai
oriunde m-as duce Tu esti akolo
si oriunde privesc iti vad ochii
mana Ta e intinsa spre mine de la inceput
de cate ori am refuzat
de cate ori te-m umilit si de cate ori te-am respins
dar Tu cu lacrimi in ochi ai intins bratele
m-ai iertat si ai murit pentru un pumn de nisip
pentru ca asta am fost si asta raman.
tac si ascult linistea caci akolo este vocea Ta
imi soptesti planurile Tale si imi zambesti ascuns
eu iti promit k o sa te ascult mai mult
Tu sti k o sa cad iar si o sa plang
as vrea sa iti promit k o sa fiu perfect
pacatul imi curge prin vene si nu pot
as vrea de acum sa imi cer iertare
as vrea sa ma ridici chiar dak ma doare
sa ma ierti,sunt doar o bucata de pamant.

Obosit...

2009-05-21T12:57:00.000+03:00

Obosit de atata suferinta,
ma asesz pe pat,
dar patul nu exista
si cad...
nici eu nu exist,
si tac...

Silence is a must

2009-05-18T18:38:00.000+03:00

Words are something that i left behind
Empty,meaningless words can't touch
I hide myself within my mind
Al i can hear is the echo and is enough.

Why should i need words to act?
Why do words brake my walls?
It kills my heart,turns desire into lust
Not another step,no words now,silence is a must.

If lips were sealed with golden rules
If around would fly only the words we need
I wouldn't have to hide behind my walls
But words are weapons of the worst.

I bring back the echo of my silence
Never would i speak with no meaning
My words will never break the walls
Will have to pray in silence for'em all.

Mai e mult...

2009-05-18T18:29:00.001+03:00

In fata mea o intindere de cioburi
Sa ajung spre mai bine,
trebuie sa trec mai departe.
Imi iau inima in dinti...
ah,si durerea,aproape ca o simti
Picaturi de sange cald curg
Curatand cioburile murdare.
Obosit si plin de durere
Intalnesc o creatura in cale,
cu voce stinsa si ochii plansi
intreb sincer si zambesc:
"mai e mult pana departe?"

2009-05-14T13:31:00.000+03:00

ROBOTS DON'T SHARE

Durere

2009-05-11T22:59:00.000+03:00

Am adormit cu durerea in dinti
M-am trezit tot cu ea,
am vrut sa ma ridic din pat
sudorile fierbinti ma tineau legat,
ca si cum cei treizeci de arginti
pe Iuda l-au spanzurat.

2009-05-10T22:17:00.000+03:00

Numar liniile de la trecerea de pietoni

la a treia linie o albina se zbate,

sa nu moara.

as vrea sa o ajut...

vine o masina........

Dragostea adevarata...

2009-04-25T19:38:00.000+03:00

Cu ce drept vorbiti voi de dragoste
Cand voi simtiti doar pofta pacatoasa
Cu ce drept raniti atatea persoane
Mereu pentru o dragoste proasta.

Ati transformat dragostea in bani
Sa nu va mai urasc vor trece multi ani
Ma dezgusta dramele tinerilor indragostiti
Nu e dragoste si prea bine o stiti.

Cum as putea sa va deschid macar odata inima
Macar odata sa va indrept spre bine privirea
Sa vedeti ca nu v-ati indragostit deloc
E doar o pasiune murdara,un mic foc.

Ati transformat dragostea in sex murdar
Sunteti gata sa va dati viata degeaba
Maine sa dus dragostea si va incepe alta iar
Dragostea adevarata nu se va transforma in ura.

Sa nu va mai aud paganilor vorbind de dragoste
Nu stiti ce inseamna,niciodata poate nu veti sti
Iubirea voastra murdara trece prea repede
Nu va cred nici daca de dragoste ati muri.

Acea iubire....

2009-04-24T21:56:00.000+03:00

Inca o iubire a murit subit
S-a stins cand soarele a rasarit
Am ingropat-o undeva intrun colt de cimitir
Mai trec pe acolo cand mai simt.

Exista oare acea iubire vesnica
Acea iubire careia sa nu-i sap groapa
Sa imi curga prin vene si sa zbor
Sa ma poarte cu aripi uriase dicolo de nori

Tot ce inseamna iubire e ingropata undeva in spate
In trecutul nevorbit,nespus si neamintit
Gandul intr-acolo nu-mi mai zboara
Orice as face alta iubire in curand o sa moara.

Soarele va straluci odata peste acea iubire
Acel sentiment nemuritor ce o sa il simt
Inca putin si vine vremea peste mine
Nu stiu daca voi fi pregatit insa pentru tine.

Nu mai astepta

2009-04-24T21:42:00.000+03:00

Multi asteapta un salvator de nicaieri
Sa apara sa le schimbe viata daramata
Renunta la tot si spera la mai bine
Poate daca ar lupta putin ar reusi.

De ce sa le plang eu lor de mila?
Cum sa indraznesc sa-i ajut
Viata si-au transformat in ruina
De ce eu sa ma lupt sa-i schimb?

Cineva sa-i loveasca mai tare putin
Realitatea sa se scalde si in ochii lor
Nu poti renunta la viata cand e greu
Nu poti astepta mereu acel salvator.

Lacrimile nu schimba nimic desi cad
Ploaia le acopera si nu se mai vad
Nu mai vreau sa-mi planga toti pe umar
As putea fi dar nu vad nici un rost.

Miracole se intampla zi de zi peste tot
De ce sa nu crezi si tu in ele acum?
Salvatorul ce-l astepti mereu nu va veni
Ridica-te singur si schimba ploaia in soare.

Lupta mereu pentru o schimbare evidenta
Nu lasa ploaia sa iti mai intre in suflet
Nu lasa pe altii sa te influenteze
De ce sa traiasca altii viata ta?

Am plecat....

2009-04-24T21:21:00.000+03:00

Intr-un razboi continuu o lume intreaga
Mai am un cartus pentru mine
Ascuns in intuneric ma lupt cu sufletul
Am sapat multe gropi pentru multi
Acum a venit randul meu sa plec spre lumina
Incarc arma,o pun la cap si trag
Viata toata pot sa o vad intr-o secunda
Ce am gresit,ce bine am facut,dispare
Ma prabusesc in tarana murdara de pacate
Am plecat din lumea asta urata si intunecata
Ma indrept spre lumina,acum sunt un inger.

Sperantele din umbra ta

2009-04-08T14:08:00.000+03:00

A trecut o saptamana de cand vorbeam cu ea la telefon si as fi tinuto asa o viata dar simteam nevoiea si dorinta sa o si vad asa ca i-am propus sa ne vedem in weekend cand ma intorc de la faculta in oras si spre surprinderea mea ea a acceptat.Nu imi venea sa cred.De cinci ani asteptam ziua in care sa ies cu ea in oras si sa am ocazia sa ii spun tot ce simt pentru ea.Partea proasta e ca era abia marti si pana vineri mai era destul de mult.Daca se razgandea?imi distrugea toate visele.

Am inceput sa ma gandesc la ziua cand am cunoscuto.Se intamplase in urma cu vreo 5 ani intr-o tabara de adolescenti cand m-a intrebat o fata,nu mai stiu exact care, de cine imi place din tabara si eu am privit-o pe ea si am spus ca de ea imi place si nu stiu din ce cauza ea a luat-o la fuga la ea in cort si a plans toata ziua dar apoi s-a obisnuit cu ideea.Am iesit impreuna vreo 2 saptamani dupa ce sa terminat tabara si apoi fara nici un motiv ne-am despartit.De fiecare data cand o vedeam dupa aceea imi schimba lumea.Nimic nu mai era la fel.Pasarile cantau altfel,culorile erau mai vii si fata mea mereu plina de zambete sincere de copil indragostit.Cel mai ciudat este faptul ca nu ne-am sarutat niciodata desi as fi vrut si ma gandeam adesea la asta dar nu am avut niciodata curajul sa o sarut.

Timpul trecea foarte greu si cateodata mi se parea ca ceasul sta si il mai loveam un pic sa isi revina dar ramnea la fel parca incercand sa imi spuna sa am rabdare.Discutiile cu colegii nu ma mai atrageau fie ca vorbeau de meciul de aseara sau de cel ce urma sau de vreo bunaciune din faculta.Eram cu gandul doar la ea,la ce o sa ii spun cand o vad,la cum sa ma port cu ea,incercam sa imi planific fiecare secunda din intalnirea noastra,fiecare pas si fiecare zambet.Adeseori eram atat de pierdut ca treceau ore intregi si eu tot la ea ma gandeam.Mai ieseam cateodata din aceste transe ciudate si incercam sa imi spun ca ar trebui sa nu visez atat si sa nu ma implic atat de repede in ceva ce nici nu stiam daca o sa existe.Nimic nu doare mai mult decat visele irosite si sfaramate in care s-a pus prea multa speranta inainte de vreme.

Vineri.Curs.Opt dimineata.Mai vioi si mai treaz ca niciodata cu toate ca de obicei dorm la cursurile de dimineata.Zambetul de pe fata mea trada tot ce incercam sa ascund,am incercat sa nu spun nimanui de ea,sa fie secretul meu,comoara mea inca nedescoperita,sa fie ea steaua ce o sa imi poarte numele.Nu imi venea sa cred ca trecuse saptamana deja si in acea seara am sa o vad.Pe ea.Prima mea prietena si speram sa fie si ultima.Dar atunci un gand ciudat si revoltator mi-a patrus in minte ca un hot ce fura tot si nu lasa nimic in urma decat durere si necaz.Un gand ce mi-a spotit usor in ureche "Dar ea? Ea se gandeste atat la tine? Isi face planuri? E nerabdatoare sa te vada?" Tremuram ca un copac in fata furtunii si inceracam sa nu ma gandesc la acele intrebari.Nu vroiam sa stiu sa raspunsul.Am plecat dupa curs grabit la camin am facut bagajul si am fugit la gara sa nu pierd trenul.Nu l-as fi pierdut pentru nimic in lume.Urma sa ma duca spre fericire,spre un paradis de unde am fost alungat pe nedrept de mult si acum imi vroiam locul inapoi.

Nu cred ca este loc mai aglomerat decat o gara intr-o zi de vineri.Haos total peste tot.Cozi infernale la case de marcat si trenul aproape ca venise.Stiam ca nu mai prind bilet dar inca mai speram cand trenul a fost anuntat in gara.Ce repede trecea timpul acum cand aveam nevoie de el,parca isi batea joc de mine,daca as fi putut sa iau cateva minute din timpul pe care il irosisem in cursul saptamanii.Dar brusc m-am oprit din gandit si am luat-o la fuga din randul in care eram, ca un prizonier ce tocmai incerca sa evadeze,am sarit un gard si apoi direct in trenul ce era deja in miscare.Nu o sa las nimic sa ma impiedice sa ajung la destinatie.Nimic.Ma gandeam ca daca nu ma intalnesc acum cu ea cine stie cand o sa mai am ocazia.Trebuia sa fac totul sa ajung.M-am deplasat rapid in compartiment unde era un frig incredibil,parca mai ceva ca afara.Imi venea sa deschid geamul sa se incalzeasca un pic dar ce poti sa astepti de la trenurile romanesti si eram in luna ianuarie,aproape februarie.

Un somn m-a cuprins fara sa am nimic de spus si am adormit imediat zgribulit intr-un colt de compartiment unde mi se parea ca e mai cald.Doar mi se parea.O voce groasa de barbat trecut de 40 de ani m-a trezit din somnul ce parca se lupta sa alunge frigul deoarece nu mai simteam nimic.Era controlorul.Ce era sa-i zic acum,ca era multa lume in gara,ca pleca trenul si nu apucam bilet,ca ma indrept spre fata viselor mele.nu stiam care raspuns sa il aleg asa ca am spus simplu ca nu am bilet.Nu mai dadusem mita pana atunci si nu stiam cum sa procedez.El s-a asezat langa mine si cu un aer superior a rostit usor si linistit un singur cuvant 'JOS".Dar nu puteam sa cobor nu inca mai aveam un pic si ajungeam la destinatie.Dupa o discutie lunga in care el mia explicat tot ce era de explicat si mia zis ce grea e viata si ca trebuie sa traieasca si el si mult altele i-am dat bani cam cat era biletul si dupa ce a plecat am cazut iar in somnul meu inghetat si fara vise.

Am ajuns la destinatie mai mult inghetat decat as fi vrut dar cum mi-am ales garderoba gresit a trebuit sa suport conscecintele.Cum am ajuns acasa am vorbit cu parintii am mai povestit cu cine era pe la mine pe acasa prin vizita asa ca orice student politicos ce isi face timp sa raspunda la toate intrebarile prostesti si apoi m-am retras la mine in camera si am sunat-o.Cand i-am auzit vocea parca auzeam cel mai minunat cor din lume cantand cea mai frumoasa melodie posibila.As fi stat sa o ascult ore intregi.Am stabilit sa ne intalnim pe la sase.Era doar trei.Parca timpul trecea iar prea incet si iar am inceput sa numar minutele privind tavanul alb pe care se jucau toate scenele cu final fericit posibile din seara aceea.Am atipit un pic si am visat lacrimi dar eu eram cel mai fericit pentru ca urma sa o vad dupa atata timp.

Drumul era destul de lung pana la locul intalnirii dar am ales sa merg pe jos.Vroiam sa ma mai gandesc la ce urma de parca nu m-am gandit destul toata saptamana.M-am intalnit cu mai multi prieteni care ma invitau in diverse locuri dar nu aveam timp de iesirile lor.Am grabit putin pasul pentru ca nu vroiam sa intarzii.Vroiam sa ajung inaintea ei deoarece citisem undeva ca da o impresie buna.Ajuns aproape acolo am vazut-o apropiindu-se.Am ajuns amandoi aproape in acelasi timp.M-am oprit putin sa o admir.Era superba mergand asa singura prin zapada si fulgii ce se asterneau usor pe ea,as fi dat orice sa fiu in locul lor atunci chiar daca urma sa ma topesc instantaneu.Nu as putea sa spun in cuvinte ce simteam atunci.Nu vreau sa imi bat joc de cuvinte si nici dictionarul nu dispune de cuvintele necesare pentru descrierea ei.Era ca si cerul.Nimeni nu il poate descrie dar toti sunt constienti ca este cel mai frumos loc posibil.

Am vorbit mult,am ras,ne-am plimbat,am tacut.Am vorbit si mai mult si apoi ea mi-a propus sa merg la o intalnire de tineret la un centru crestin si am acceptat imediat doarece mai vroiam sa fiu cu ea.Ne-am indreptat catre centru mergand prin zapada ce parca imi soptea sa nu o las sa plece pana nu-i spun ce simpt pentru ea.Am ajuns la centru dar intalnirea se terminase deja.Ma intristasem putin deoarece ea locuia aproape de centru si vroia sa mearga acasa.Si eu inca nu-i dezvaluisem sentimentele mele si visele si sperantele si tot ce aveam sa-i spun.Spre surprinderea mea s-a oferit sa ma conduca pana la iesirea din cartier.

Faceam pasii tot mai mici deoarece nu vroiam sa ajung in locul de unde ea urma sa se intoarca inapoi dar intr-un final am ajuns akolo si inca destul de repede.Iar timpul nu a fost de partea mea.Am vrut sa plec dupa ce ne-am luat ramas bun si am zambit dar m-am intors si am luat-o in brate.Nu puteam sa plec inca.In momentul acela cand am avut-o atat de aproape de mine am simtit ca sunt complet,ca nu mai am nevoie de nimic.Ea si-a ridicat putin privirea si i-am vazut ochii negrii.Atunci am sarutat-o.Dupa atata timp am sarutat-o dar spre surpinderea mea ea nu mi-a raspuns la sarut.Nu mai stiam ce sa fac.Cum sa procedez.Asta nu era in planurile mele.Sperantele si visele le vedeam in ceata si tot mai departe de mine.Inca o tineam in brate cand m-a privit si am vazut cum buzele ei se indreapata spre ale mele.Asa cum un alergator simte ca urmeaza linia de sosire si urmeaza sa ia premiul cel mare la care a visat mereu asa am simtit si eu.Cand m-a sarutat o lumina alba parca ne-a inconjurat pentru a ne uni pe vecie si lacrimi cristaline se prelingeau lin pe obrajii mei inghetati parca aducandui la viata.Apoi am privit cerul si am vazut cum stele imi zambeau si parca fulgii de nea erau mesagerii lor si imi spuneau ca de acum voi fi fericit si totul va fi perfect.O tineam in brate si plangeam de bucurie.Era ireal.

"NU" s-a auzit dintr-o data din gura ei ce mai devreme imi arata fericirea.S-a desprins din bratele mele si incerca sa imi explice ca nu poate.Ca nu e pregatita.Eu ascultam dar parca eram lovit de tun direct in moalele capului si nu puteam reactiona deloc.Totul in jurul meu se spargea si disparea.Stele nu mai erau pe cer.Erau ascunse dupa nori.Nu voiau sa vada caderea mea.Degeaba incercam sa-i explic eu ca am sa astept cat e nevoie.Cat trebuie.Oricat as fi asteptat.Lacrimile de bucurie se transformasera in lacrimi de durere ce imi inghetau obrajii ce de atunci uitara zambetul acela sincer ce adesea il aveam.Nu vroiam sa vada ca plang asa ca am luato in brate.Nu i-as mai fi dat drumul niciodata.Stiam ca atunci cand ii voi da drumul nu o voi mai avea niciodata.O voi pierde.Timpul iar a castigat si desi era foarte frig afara nu vroia sa inghete macar odata sa o tin mai mult langa mine.A plecat.In umbra ei se ascundeau toate visele mele si ea le lua acum cu ea.Nu le voi mai avea niciodata.Ea nu va mai fi.Am cazut in zapada si am plans.Eram singur pe strada.Durerea ce o simteam era prea mare sa o port mereu cu mine dar inrobit de ea m-am ridicat si tragand picioarele dupa mine am plecat.

Mai trec si acum pe acolo,pe strada aceea incercand parca sa alunec in timp macar odata inapoi la acea seara sa repar ceva.Privesc coltul acela de strada si caut cu privirea visele pierdute si lacrimile ce le-am lasat acolo cand am cazut prada durerii.Am cautato si pe ea cu privirea dar nu mai era,nu acolo,nu atunci.Mi-am pus masca la loc si zambetul fals ce il port mereu si cu pasi mici m-am indepartat de coltul strazii unde am pierdut tot si am cunoscut durerea ce o port mereu cu mine.
"Unde esti tu fericire pura?Dar tu zambet curat de copil indragostit?" "Sunt pierdute in umbra ei de mult", imi raspunse masca ce o port sa ascund durerea.Intorc capul sa mai privesc odata strada aceea dar nu o mai zaresc.Cerul se innoreaza.Ploua.Plec

2009-03-12T22:45:00.000+02:00

As vrea sa inteleg neintelesul
Cat as clipi sa aiba sens non-sensul
Dar daca as sti totul oare
Ar mai avea viata atata culoare?
M-as plimba singur printre nestiutori
Acuzand pe toti de a lor erori
As fi ca un crin printre spini
M-as sufoca si singur as muri.

E bine si asa cum sunt acum
Nu-mi inteleg nici propriul drum
Nu stiu ce sens au multe lucruri
Dar e mai bine asa fara sensuri.

Cand ai sa vi?

2009-03-12T22:40:00.000+02:00

Unde esti tu, Moarte
Pe unde te ascunzi?
Cui aduci eliberare?
Pe cine mai scufunzi?

Cati te asteapta acum zambind,
Cati te-njura printre dinti?
Tu vi mereu la timp,
Niciodata, tu, nu minti.

Singuratatea te-nconjoara
Misterul ti-e a ta naframa.
De atatia mii si mii de ani
vii mereu, cand te vei plictisi?

Te astept si eu ca toti ceilalti
Stiu ca ai sa vi la timp
As vrea sa te astept zambind
Cand vei veni, usor, sa ma inalti

Dar cand?

2009-02-09T12:45:00.000+02:00

Cu spatele la religiile unei lumi pagane
Incerc sa ignor credintele create de lume
Curg pe obraji fierbinte lacrime
Cu ochii inchisi, deschis la minte.

Nu mai vine acel raspuns sfant
Ce imi va spune cine sunt
Glasul TAU nu pot sa il aud
Poate nu sunt pregatit, dar cand?

Esti

2009-02-09T12:33:00.000+02:00

N-as putea spune ca TU traiesti
TU din vesnicii mereu ai fost si esti
Noi oamenii cu toti traim
Cand vine vremea mai si murim
Dar TU nu traiesti
TU, pur si simplu, ESTI

Prea....

2009-02-06T13:53:00.001+02:00

Prea multe priviri de gheata,
Prea multi aud dar nu asculta
Atatia au uitat sa mai traiasca
Multi plang in ei inca odata.

Nimeni nu poate intelege
Prin ce treci, ce se intampla
Prea multi vor sa te lege
Deoarece nu esti ca ei,o cauza pierduta.

Daca incerci sa-i ajuti
Te vor uri mai mult
Prea multi cred ca minti
Fara sa spui vreun cuvant.

Renuntand incet la cei din jur
Incerci sa nu ajungi ca ei acum
Pleci privirea si dispari in fum
Ramai singur pe al tau drum...

Consecinte

2009-02-06T13:47:00.000+02:00

Daca as putea da timpu' napoi
Un singur lucru as face
Nu v-as mai iubi pe voi
Si viitoru' ar tace.

Iubirea mi-a luat viata
Dar voi ati taiat ata
De care atarna speranta
Acum, dar, se intoarce roata.

De as putea schimba tot trecutul
Ar fi diferit tot viitorul
As iubi mai mult prezentul,
Nu as mai simti dorul.

Nimic, insa, nu se schimba
Se iarta pacatul
Ramane o consecinta
Ingenunchiaza si imparatul.

Rabdare

2009-02-06T13:43:00.000+02:00

Dureri si suspine reci
Imi spun prin ce treci
Poate crezi ca iubesti
Mai bine ar fi sa te linistesti.

Ce simti acum nu e iubire
Vrei totul doar pentru tine
Egoismul ti-a umplut inima
Ar fi mai usor daca ai renunta.

Nu iti fa false sperante
Nu coase totul cu albe ate
Nu sti inca ce-i iubirea
Nu-ti strica de acum inima.

Ai rabdare, gandeste
Nu te arunca orbeste,
Prea tare vei suferi
Rabdare, nu te pripi.

Sus.....jos

2009-02-06T13:37:00.000+02:00

Cu putinele sarutari ce mi le-ai dat
Ai hranit un suflet de mult inmormantat
L-ai scos din groapa, l-ai salvat
De toate bolile l-ai vindecat.

Un suflet hranit cu minciuni prea curate.
Un suflet ce a crezut in vorbe nu in fapte
Nu poate rezista prea mult
Cade prins in al lumii haos si tumult.

Ce minune sa infaptuiesc?
Cum sa iti arat cat de mult te iubesc?
Am ajuns dependent de minciunile tale,
Fara ele cerul cade, cade si tot cade.

Rana din inima prea adanca e,
Singurul lucru ce o mai alina sunt alte suflete
Am ajuns sa le vanez peste tot
Cred ca am ajuns un fel de robot...mort

Cu buretele in mana

2009-02-06T13:32:00.001+02:00

Cu buretele in mana,
Sterg si sterg din greu
Trecutul pare sa ramana
Prezentul nu-i al meu.

Nu pot schimba ce am facut
Nu pot fi ce nu mai sunt
Pot sa o iau de le inceput
Dar nu pot schimba ce am facut.

Buretele nu poate sterge nimic,
Sa schimb o lume mare sunt prea mic
Pot doar sa uit, sa iert
Oricum toate odata tot trec.

Suntem toti purtati de vant
Aruncati cu forta-n viata
Nici nu mi-a trecut prin gand
Sa pot schimba ceva vreodata.

2009-02-06T13:25:00.000+02:00

căutare personalizată

Bradule.....

2009-02-06T13:21:00.000+02:00

Ce-ti pasa tie brad batran
Ce viata am eu acum
Tu esti mereu magic si verde
Eu sunt cel ce inca pierde.

Hai sa facem schimb odata
Sa vezi si tu cum e o viata
Cat de rea si urata este lumea
Sa simti cat doare inima.

Lasa-ma doar o zi macar
Sa simt cum e sa fi mare
De te-as convinge doar,doar
Nu m-as mai intoarce in lume.

Inteleg de ce tot ma refuzi
As da orice sa plec din lumea asta
O, TU cel ce ai creat viata
Oare TU nu ma auzi?

Am pierdut

2009-01-25T04:08:00.000+02:00

Am pierdut perfectul,nu-l mai pot atinge
Plang si plang cu lacrimi de sange
Cazut-am cu forta din inaltimi
Cand am ales sa ne despartim
Poate ma tarasc acum si cersesc
Insa nu am sa refuz niciodata sa traiesc
Tot ce faci are sigur o urmare
Ma ridic usor sa nu deranjez prea tare
Incet te voi arunca in a inimii mormant
Nu mai vorbi,nu zambi,nu o sa mai plang

Numele meu

2009-01-16T15:54:00.000+02:00

Batand tara in lung si-n lat
Am ajuns de unde am plecat
Nici macar nu am gasit ce am cautat
Ci mai mult am pierdut,m-am ratacit
Iubind am mers si nu am fost oprit
Unde esti tu,esti de negasit.

Eram prins in prea multe pacate
Mi-am permis prea multe fapte
Am ajuns sa traiesc doar in noapte
Nu mai stiu cum este ziua
Unde mi-am pierdut iubirea?
Erau prea multe alegeri proaste
Le-am lasat pe toate-n spate.

Invins si cazut, eram la pamant
Orb si prea lovit de vant
Am ajuns si te-am gasit pe tine
Nu aveam nimic si tu mi-ai dat iubire.

As vrea

2009-01-16T15:50:00.000+02:00

Toata lumea scrie carti
Mai mult despre ideile altora
N-au idei si n-au talent
Se opresc mereu si fura!

As vrea sa citesc o poezie de Eminescu
Fara sa mi-o aprofundeze cineva
As vrea sa-i inteleg singur sensu'
Sa fie doar parerea mea!

Imi repugna ideea ca toti sunt critici
Nici un cuvant nu mai poti sa zici
Ca sar toti si dau cu parerea
Dar asta le este rolul,asta le e viata

Mai marsh toti astia,explicatorilor
nu ma intereseaza ce aveti de spus
Plecati din lumea mea,tradatorilor
Viitorul vostru de mult a apus!!!

Realitate

2009-01-15T19:20:00.000+02:00

O fatza din oglina preacurata
Imi zambeste neincetat
Un zambet idiot si de ratat
Care ma trezeste in fiecare dimineatza.

Ochii mari si obositi intreaba
"Cand te vei trezi si tu odata"?
Si-apoi clipesc usor si rece
Clipa mai departe trece.

De ce sa ma trezesc la viata?
Cand viata mea e in vis
Si visul meu e viata totodata
Refuz sa fiu ca toti un trist.

Imi traiesc visul neincetat
Nu ca un lucru de terminat
Fericirea e de moment
Fa-o sa treaca cat mai incet.

In trecut

2009-01-15T19:15:00.000+02:00

Am renuntat sa cred ca se mai poate
Am renuntat la eroicele fapte
Impins din fata si din spate
Am renuntat sa cred ca se mai poate.

Privesc mereu spre un trecut de aur
Am renuntat prezentul sa il mai traiesc
Tot ce am e in trecut, trecutul il iubesc
Privesc mereu spre un trecut de aur.

"Aici", "acum" nu mai exista,le ignor
Ce a fost este mai pretios, le iubesc, le ador
Nu ma gandesc deloc la viitor
"Aici", "acum" nu mai exista,le ignor.

Atat de multi inca mai cred ca pot
Insa am renuntat de mult la tot
Dezamagit ies de pe scena
Atat de multi inca mai cred ca pot.

In mijlocul vietii

2009-01-15T19:08:00.001+02:00

In mijlocul desertului, o floare
In mijlocul junglei de betoane, un pic din soare
In mijlocul razboiului meu, o scapare
Te-am strigat dar n-ai dat ascultare.

Te-am asteptat pe ulite pustii si reci
Imi faceam sperante ca ai sa treci
Ai sa ma privesti,sa ma salvezi
Dar n-ai venit si-ncet te pierzi.

Cu fiecare dimineata singuratica
Ce venea la timp neincetat
Imi faceam inca o speranta
Ca nu a fost degeaba atata asteptat.

Sentimentele au plecat, au ruginit
De mult ochii nu ti-am privit
Ma indrept usor, incet spre un sfarsit de veac
Nu mai veni, m-am pierdut, nu mai am leac.